Spring 2014 Menswear: JUUN.J

I would wear every single one of these looks. How often can you say that about a Menswear collection? Korean designer JUUN.J has got it down. Men hold all the style titles in Korea (yes I can give examples of awards; King of Style, Most Stylish, Miss Style, Style Bafta ok?). The radest women in Korea just work men's clothes. I reckon it's the same here in England (course I do, my wardrobe hasn't seen a floral skirt since I was eight, once these clown feet grew there was no kidding anyone I was a girl; hey as long as you've got denim underwear on instead of trousers you're sexy yeah? No? What?).

Cited as an influence was that dahhhhling of the 1980s Princess Diana... Jokes, can you see her in leather hot pants? OI SNAP OUT OF IT, ATTENTION BACK TO ME. She is the People’s Princess and an angel; get your mind out of the gutter you dirtbag, I’m loving angels instead (thanks Robbie). Nah it was Claude Montana who inspired Juun with his Stretch Armstrong giant-shouldered aesthetic, perfect for my giant rowers shoulders (ok ok I rowed for a year... in the world championships... stop bringing it up alright it's embarrassing). Yep clown feet and body of a piece of Toblerone; I'm a babe.

The numbered jerseys are set to ride the wave of Astrid Andersen’s success in Korea. Send one to G-Dragon ASAP Juun and you’re set; ₩millions in the bank, it’s high rollin’ from the second he #s your name. Whilst you’re at the post office Juun pop the white shorts suit in the post for me please, ta. Shame these beautiful male models whose feet I worship at will look far more feminine in this little hot-panted suit than me. Give me your eyebrows boys, they're perfection. You may have my mono in return; one truly is the loneliest number.

I got a startle on (is this a phrase?) as the jumpers - or *nasal American accent* sweaters - swaggered out at the end, they were such a sharp contrast to the rest of the collection's feel which was monotonous, the detailing in the garments construction. Everyone buzzes off these Mark Ryden-esque Pop-Surrealist characters, and none more so than me, so perhaps no surprise I want one, I need one, got to have it, now I made it, I'm addicted, now I'm feigning CAUSE ONCE YOU GET ONE YOU DON'T WANNA LEAAAAVE. Soz any excuse for a bit of Eminem... except he's talking about cocaine addiction... so it probs doesn't relate... Cue 'Fashion addiction is like totally as bad as heroin' Kim Kardashian, ladies and gentlemen. Jokes she didn't say that; the word 'addiction' is too long for her. Appolz, her name doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same post as designs of this caliber.

Except if I'm saying 'WOAH JUUN.J'S AMAZINGGGGG HE IS A DEITY HE IS EVERYTHING, GET HIM NEAR ME GET HIM IN MY ARMS... I hate Kim Kardashian'.

Over and RANT.

MdV x

ALL PHOTOS: WWD.COM