Resort 2014: Sachin & Babi

This collection looks like it's from the high street, albeit a higher-end schmancy shop like Hobbs or Whistles or summat me Ma likes. However I couldn't resist a blog post about it because, get ready for it, guys there is a light at the end of the tunnel; Sachin & Babi (who?) have kindly built the world the perfect maxi skirt. It's got the four Fs and not one of them is the one you're thinking of; it's fitted at the top, floor-length, flowy underneath and flattering on EVERYone. Bravo Sachin, well done Babi. I applaud you.

Elsewhere there's 70s high waist orange pants that'd look megacool if a) you're a racing driver with an orange car in the 1970s, b) you're as hipless - and I don't mean uncool - as Cheryl Cole (I will NOT lower myself to calling her just Cheryl, as long as you're branded with 'Mrs Cole' you've got the name, soz. ALSO boys, why? Why her? Look at the barbed wire around her thigh. She should be rammed in a hammock outside her rented trailer screaming at Kyle and Macayla and Jordan and Rihannon and Kayleigh and Dwayne and Krystal and Mercedes and Rochelle and Raquelle and Chantelle and L'Oréal to "Come eat your chips before I fuckin' do") or c) you are the divine angel-faced Andrej Pejić.

There's also an embellished pastel blue jacket for those of you who've got the funds for Christopher Kane's Spring 2013 but not the nerve. I don't blame you, described by Kane himself as 'Clothes that make you feel a bit sick', the kitsch lacy pastel outfits with contrasting gaffa tape are not everyone's cuppa. Though personally I reckon take the advice Disturbed have been pushing since the nineties and 'get down with the sickness'. Like every model on the Kane catwalk pulling em off, get your bulimic on and be thin enough to wear them.

A whole blog entry just for one great skirt, who's got the time for that? I'll stop now

ALL PHOTOS: STYLE.COM